


For the first time in forever, something new.

by shulamithbond



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King, Pennywise - Fandom, Pennywise-fandom
Genre: Blow Jobs, Cannibalism, Disability, Disabled Character, Dom/sub Undertones, Dubious Consent, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Feeding Kink, Fingerfucking, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Light Masochism, Light Sadism, M/M, Monsters, Penis In Vagina Sex, Pennywise learns about the hellscape of capitalism, Self-Insert, Suicidal Thoughts, Trans, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Vore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2018-03-03
Packaged: 2019-01-16 00:09:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12331602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shulamithbond/pseuds/shulamithbond
Summary: A mild-mannered, probably-suicidal, closeted trans man meets a bloodthirsty interdimensional alien who looks like a clown most of the time. Hijinks (mostly sexual) ensue.In case anyone is curious, the title comes from an excerpt from the novel that I found, which is in third-person Pennywise POV.





	1. Chapter 1

You can never anticipate when the bizarre will enter your life, just as you can never anticipate any other personal tragedy; the death of an elderly but still-sprightly and alert grandparent, or the announcement of divorce from two parents who previously had seemed as happy as always together. The only possible sign that chaos is about to enter one’s life, is for everything to be ticking along with complete normality; the calm before the storm.

 

Nathan left work at the call center at eight-thirty, waving goodbye to the coworkers who streamed out the door past him to their cars, calling out “‘Night, Rachel!” over their shoulders. Nathan smiled and waved back as nicely as he could, pulling the collar of his blouse up self-consciously to cover his cleavage. He felt an old pain, almost just an extension of his post-work weariness. It barely bothered him anymore.

 

It was early September, but even up here in Maine the nights had not yet begun to get cold; not until Halloween at least, anymore. For once, Nathan was glad. Even if walking hadn’t been his main form of transportation, things got too icy in winter, even when he used his cane. He was absent from work a lot more often, and even though they were very understanding, he still didn’t get paid for the days he missed, once his sick time was used up. So as long as it was still possible to walk places in town, he knew he had to stockpile as much money as he could to survive on over the winter. Hopefully SSI or Medicaid would help with that.  _ If you get either one. _

 

Nathan didn’t notice the figure at first, caught up as he was in his usual anxieties over the future. The signal took a while to reach his conscious mind, and for a second, he stopped on the sidewalk, pulling off his headphones. The silence of the night hit him suddenly and sent a chill through him. There was no one else visible on the street, but he had just passed an alley between two storefronts.

 

Something had been standing there, and two glowing yellow lights had peered out from the shadows.

 

Maybe he’d only imagined it in the dark. The glimpse had lasted all of what, two seconds? Five? Either way, he knew he should just keep walking.

 

For a few seconds, he almost did, until Nathan realized that he didn’t know if there was anything behind him. He didn’t think he’d heard anything.

 

He looked back at the dark street behind him. There was nothing there, and Nathan let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding.

 

Finally Nathan resumed his steps, but he didn’t turn his music back on, listening for footfalls other than his own, behind him on the sidewalk or street. But he could hear nothing except his own footsteps on the pavement, and every so often, the distant  _ woosh _ of a car speeding by along the main road up ahead.

 

There was another alley coming up between two more buildings ahead. Nathan swallowed, dragging his feet a moment, and resolving to run past the mouth of the alley quickly. There was no one here to see him being childish on the dark street, so why not?

 

He began to run, and for a moment his thoughts ran ahead of his body, expecting to feel the curb opposite the alleyway under his feet. He realized only belatedly that he was scrambling in the air, flying backward into the shadows, in the grip of  _ something _ .

 

His first thought was muggers. Very strong muggers. He tried to say, “I’ll give you my money, but can I please keep my ID and my blood sugar testing kit and stuff” but the words got lost on the way to his mouth, which was now very dry. He felt cold, especially his hands and fingers. He was detached from his body, and watched his hands reach for his bag and unzip it clumsily, digging for his wallet. Still, Nathan peered up through the gloom, trying to see.

 

There was just one figure. It was humanoid, but tall. The two yellow points of light focused down on Nathan, and he realized their placement suggested they were eyes.

 

His hands stopped searching, some part of his hindbrain deciding that money was most likely not what the figure was after, and that the prey instinct of freezing on the off-chance he might not be seen, might be a good idea. Maybe not in this particular case, since the thing had grabbed him, but he still stood frozen in place, legs somehow not buckling.

 

Nathan’s eyes adjusted enough to the gloom that he could see the figure more clearly, and something in distant memory stirred. The wild red hair - red makeup over white - the Gacy clothes...

 

“Oh my God,” he whispered. Some things are fairly obvious when a seven-foot-tall clown that wears its body like a bad suit is staring down at you hungrily. 

 

Nathan was vaguely surprised not to be more triggered than he was. But then, it was a different kind of danger than it had been with Dan. Maybe not  _ better _ , but at least marginally easier to handle in the moment; more straightforward, in a way. Monsters on a dark street were less...intimate.

 

Or maybe his brain had just decided that keeping him alert was more important than clinging to old habits.

 

“I saw you once,” his mouth said as the creature got closer. “Looking in the window at me. I thought it was a bad dream.”

 

The clown grinned widely with red-painted lips, revealing long, sharp teeth. “So sorry to disappoint you.” A long fingered hand grabbed his arm and held it like a vice. “Don’t do anything silly, now. You just hold still like a good boy and this will only hurt for a minute.”

 

“You don’t just...just take some blood or anything like that?” Nathan asked hopefully. “Maybe?”

 

The clown chuckled. “I’m afraid not.”

 

_ I should be fighting for my life _ . But whether it was depression, or just the hindbrain sense of the prey, he knew it wouldn’t do any good. It would make the thing angry, probably, and then death would just be more painful. _ You’re such a fucking coward. _

 

“Fucking coward,” he heard himself mutter. 

 

The yellow gaze settled back on him, one of the painted eyebrows rising slowly, and Nathan clarified quickly. “I meant me, not you. Sorry. Um...how did you know I was a guy?” 

 

He didn’t know whether he was trying to keep the thing talking, or just distracting himself. “Shit, I’m going to die in my work clothes.  _ Fuck _ .”  _ They’re going to misgender the hell out of you at the memorial service too _ , he added mentally to himself.  _ If there even is one _ .

 

The clown looked mildly interested and perhaps a little amused. “I could smell it. In your blood.” 

 

“Oh.” The mention of blood brought it all home, somehow. “This is how I die,” Nathan realized aloud. “Oh my God, this is how I die.” He felt even colder and more disconnected from his body now -  _ maybe my soul getting ready to leave it _ \- even as his stomach churned and he felt his heart speed up.

 

“Yes, it is.” The clown took his other arm and lifted him effortlessly. Nathan’s feet swung in the air. His right loafer fell off and hit the pavement.

 

_ Breathe. At least while we can, just breathe _ . “What are you?” Nathan asked quietly. The clown looked down at him with mild curiosity; the look a cat might give a mouse that had just done a strange new trick. 

 

Nathan gulped. “You might as well tell me, right?” he pointed out.

 

The clown chuckled again. It was a low, growling sound from the back of the throat, and Nathan tried not to get wet. It was funny, he thought distantly; he’d always wondered whether being into vorarephilia meant that if something ever actually  _ did _ try to eat him, it would be arousing; or whether he’d just be scared for his life and bodily safety like anyone else. It turned out it was a bit of the former, at least with this predator. _ But I’d still really,  _ _ really _ _ love not to die. Damn, I really picked a hell of a time  _ _ not _ _ to be suicidal _ .

 

“I’m Pennywise, the dancing clown,” the clown introduced himself, grin widening, pulling Nathan closer.

 

“Do you dance?” Nathan asked in spite of himself.

 

The clown actually laughed that time. “Sometimes.”

 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” said Nathan carefully. “What I actually meant was...what are you?” He tried to explain. “Like, you’re obviously not a human…”

 

Pennywise’s look turned sour. One hand grabbed Nathan’s neck. A long, razor-edged nail ( _ wasn’t he wearing gloves? _ ) scraped his throat, while the other fingers squeezed. “You talk too much.”

 

“Yeah,” Nathan rasped. “Sorry, I think my brain’s trying to distract me from this…” The red mouth was getting closer.

 

Nathan didn’t quite know what happened next, except that when his brain awoke again, his lips were pressed against two others. 

 

They had to belong to the clown.

 

Pennywise pulled Nathan off him, holding him at arm’s length and staring at him as if he was a new species of pest he hadn’t yet encountered. Nathan gasped for breath.

 

At last, the clown asked, “Why did you do that?”

 

Nathan managed to shrug a little in his grip. “I don’t...I haven’t kissed anybody in a long time. And I’m about to die, so I wanted... Sorry. I know I should have asked first…” His face was burning; it had to be even redder than usual.  _ He’s probably going to rip me apart for that; fuck me, why the fuck did I do that… _

  
  


Instead, the clown pulled him close again, and Nathan braced himself as the monster leaned into the crook of Nathan’s neck, just above where it met his shoulder. Instead of a bite, he felt hot breath on his skin. He waited.

 

Pennywise looked down at him again, scrutinizing him. “I can smell your fear,” he remarked at last, thoughtfully. Then, “But there is something else…”

 

For a minute, Nathan couldn’t think what he meant. Then… _ Oh God, I thought my face was red before _ .

 

“It’s...it’s just…” Nathan swallowed. “I’m scared, don’t worry, you’re really terrifying to me, I swear, and I don’t want to die, it’s just… it sort of turns me on, too. The idea of getting eaten.”  _ Great, now I’m also going to die completely humiliated _ .

 

Pennywise frowned. “‘Turned on’?”

 

Nathan gulped. “Um...like sex? You know?”

 

Pennywise still looked...uncertain. Nathan wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.

 

He watched the clown’s lip curl slowly, looking confused and now also seemingly disgusted, and Pennywise dropped him unceremoniously to the pavement.

 

Nathan scrambled for his shoe, and his bag.  _ If I’m going to live, I’ll need my test kit and ID and stuff _ . “Thank you,” he managed, getting to his feet despite the soreness of his body at falling onto asphalt.

 

The clown didn’t reply. He just stood there balefully and watched Nathan as he ran for home. Nathan tried not to feel the eyes on him as he ran. He was pretty sure the clown was still watching him even when Nathan managed to get back to his building and shut the door hard.

 

* * *

Nathan’s apartment was a real bargain. It was just one main room, plus a little anteroom-closet with some shelves and a door to a small bathroom on the side. Still, there was no extra charge for pets, so he got to keep Fang, and even though he didn’t actually have a kitchen, he had his fridge from college, and a microwave, a hot plate, and his electric kettle. That was enough for most things he ate right now; the hot plate wasn’t too different from a stove top anyway.

 

He filled the kettle from the bathroom tap now, and turned it on to warm. He needed some tea to calm down; he couldn’t stop pacing, and even changing out of his work clothes had taken unusually long while he puttered around, forgetting what he was doing and where everything was. Fang had looked up from his ball on the bedspread when Nathan came in, but now he hid under the bed, behind the plastic bins full of food and supplies Nathan stowed there.

 

All the memories were coming back now. At the time, thanks to his trial-and-error experiences in private middle school, Nathan had learned how to skate under the radar of most of the school’s bullies, mean girls, and abusive teachers and staff, with the most minimal of friction. The best way to survive was to be noticed as little as possible.

 

He’d therefore been in a prime position to notice things himself. Like the kids who disappeared, and the way no one ever talked about it.

 

It was like predators in the wild; lions and wolves allegedly went after the weakest and sickest in the herd; those were the ones they could pick off while they were on their own. Looking back, Nathan had probably been on his own too often to be completely safe, although he’d managed to stick close enough to acquaintances and elementary school friends in the arts clubs that nobody actually wanted to target him.

 

This thing - Pennywise the dancing clown - was like that, too. It -  _ he? _ \- took the small kids, or the weak kids, or the kids no one cared much about. 

 

_ I never wanted to come back here. I wish I never had _ . But he’d needed the money that would come from selling his parents’ house. And he’d needed to get away from Dan.

 

Pennywise had spared him for some reason. Probably disgust. Maybe it was weird, the thought of eating someone who might be getting off on it. Personally, Nathan thought it would probably ease his conscience about the whole thing, but maybe creatures like Pennywise didn’t have consciences or pity. Or maybe to Pennywise, it was no different from eating chicken or beef, and the idea of the meat getting off on being eaten was just too strange.  _ But again, I’d feel better about eating meat if I thought the animals were enjoying it _ .  _ And how can you think of something as ‘meat’ if you can  _ _ talk _ _ to it? _

  
  


_ Maybe he’ll change his mind _ . Nathan shivered. He still wasn’t exactly an outcast, but he didn’t have any close friends at work, just the older lady in the cubicle next to his, who was nice to him.

 

He didn’t have any friends in town at all, really.

 

Nathan caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror on the anteroom door. He didn’t own a scale; had never willingly weighed himself since he’d turned eighteen. Ever since he’d hit puberty...well, really since he’d gotten his insulin pump and gotten off his first diabetic meal plan, he’d never been able to stop eating.

 

_ It doesn’t help that you’ve been a feedist, vore-loving pervert for as long as you can remember. _ Nathan sighed.  _ Well, at least being a perv helped me not get killed tonight, maybe. That’s good, right? _

 

He looked at himself - round face, the beginnings of a double chin, a body ‘curvy’ to say the least with a round belly and uncomfortably large breasts, too big to hide with a binder - and wondered if fat made you more appetizing to a creature like Pennywise. Probably not. Fat was only good when you could cook the meat long enough for the fat to melt and tenderize things. That situation probably didn’t arise for Pennywise. He wasn’t sure whether that made him feel better, or worse.  _ So I would have been a shitty meal anyways. Not even good for that. _

 

He drank some mint tea, ate a bowl of instant oatmeal, took his pills, fed Fang, and crawled into bed; what else could he do? He didn’t feel too hungry after the encounter with the clown, which was a good thing. Still, he felt wired, and found his hand drifting between his legs despite the nervousness and fear that still filled him. _ Look away, Fang, look away _ .


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Overeating, more perverted (and semi-suicidal) vore thoughts from our hero, and masturbation. Yay!

At first, it was difficult for Nathan not to look over his shoulder or scan his surroundings constantly for the clown, watching him like he had all those years ago. 

 

Fang noticed he was jumpy, and alternated between climbing onto Nathan to purr and knead his chest through the blankets when they went to bed at night, and arching his back before hiding under something during the day.

 

Trish, the young grandmother in the cubicle next to Nathan, noticed too. “Is anything wrong?” she asked one night during their break. “You know you can tell me.” She lowered her voice. “Did that awful boyfriend come back?”

 

“No, nothing like that,” Nathan promised her. Even if the woman did believe him, telling her might make her a target of the creature. “It’s just...I had an argument on the internet, that’s all. And I’m worried about politics and Medicaid getting defunded and everything. You know me, I’m just a nervous person.” He’d come out to Trish once, after their supervisor joked for the millionth time about “there are no men in this office!” and Trish’s answer had been something neutral like “that’s fine, I don’t judge.” He hadn’t brought it up again, and neither had she.

 

As so often happened in Nathan’s head, fear turned to obsession. Maybe that was how he’d gotten this way - maybe the first time he’d heard or read or seen  _ Hansel and Gretel _ , it had scared his childhood self so badly that he’d had to develop this reaction, this kink, as some kind of coping mechanism.

 

Why didn’t the clown want to tell Nathan what he was? Okay, maybe it wasn’t the most polite or culturally sensitive question in the universe, but there was no harm in telling the helpless prey you were toying with right before you ate them, right? But the question had really seemed to upset Pennywise. Why was that? Where had he come from? Why was he here?

 

He’d begun searching the internet between phone calls at work, and in his free time between eating and sleeping. He’d been interested in Lovecraftian monsters and cryptids for awhile, for story-writing and worldbuilding purposes if nothing else, but now the topic had taken on a new and somewhat terrifying light. Nathan usually couldn’t stop himself from being skeptical, and he still thought most accounts of the paranormal were probably either hoaxes or at least very confused people, but…  _ you’ve studied clinical research, even if college was a little while ago. You know its limits. Some things, you can’t test for in a laboratory setting. And scientists are humans, too - their preconceptions get in the way of their results sometimes. There are numerous cases of this in history. _

 

_ Something might have slipped through the cracks. _

 

Nathan tried not to think about how much he wanted that to be true. To live in a world where there was a God to complain to, and something else after you died, and some way for the meek to actually inherit the Earth beyond organizing and revolting, which they would never successfully do.

 

His eating had changed, too. More specifically, the progress he’d made had gone backwards. And Nathan had thought he was making  _ some _ improvements in his behaviors with food, buying as healthy as he could afford to and cooking whenever he could instead of eating junk food or takeout. He was also trying to get better at not cleaning out the metaphorical pantry every time anything stressful happened, but...well, this was really,  _ really _ stressful.

 

He had needed a little dinner before bed, and a grilled cheese was one of his favorites. But he was still hungry when the sandwich was gone. He was too tired to cook anything else; he’d already have dishes to do before bed as it was.

 

_ You’ve had a rough time lately. It’s okay to have a cheat night _ . Nathan knew that was bullshit; this wasn’t just some bullshit diet, it was a psychological thing, and he didn’t need any more food until tomorrow morning. _ I should just go to bed _ .

 

Instead, he found himself reaching for the complimentary Oreo packs he’d gotten from work for some reason and squirrelled away at the back of one bin. He’d forgotten how good they were in milk, and with a little Nutella...and then he was craving pretzels dipped in Nutella (his mother had always liked chocolate-covered pretzels).

 

It was hard to get really full when you were on a food budget, and besides, since the diagnosis, fullness too often had felt like a prelude to nausea. But tonight, it felt  _ good _ . The way it had used to feel, when this was the way Nathan calmed himself down and rewarded himself, after class or whatever other grinding daily routine he’d managed to pull himself through. He relaxed back on the bed that doubled as his couch, watching some YouTube video or other that he’d seen a million times already, and opened a bag of cheddar popcorn to get the sweetness out of his mouth. The bag said reduced fat, and popcorn was mostly air anyway, right?

 

_ The clown could be watching you right now. _ The thought rose to the surface of his consciousness again, unbidden, and Nathan swallowed his mouthful slowly, the idea freezing him. His window-shade was down, but would that really stop a being like Pennywise?

 

Between how full he felt, and his memory of that night... _ stop it, clitoris. You stop that shit right now _ .

 

His shade  _ was _ pulled down, though. Nobody would ever know (except poor Fang, and he had to be used to this crap by now), and who knew the next time he’d feel this wonderfully full?

 

Nathan licked off the sticky fingers on his right hand, checked to make sure Fang wasn’t staring at him (that was always weird), and reached quietly between his legs, through his sweatpants.

 

_ If he’s watching you right now, he just saw you stuffing your piggy face. Making yourself even fatter. He’s probably wishing he hadn’t let a porker like you get away. Or maybe he’ll come back now that you’re even chubbier for him. There’s nothing you could do about it if he did. He could swallow you whole. Or if you tried to escape or fight back - if you caused him any trouble - he could tear you apart. Torture you and obliterate you with a smile on his face. _

 

_ But he won’t need to, because you’re such a good little morsel for him, fattening yourself up even more while you just wait around for him to take you again… _

 

Nathan gasped and moaned as the orgasm hit him. It had been awhile since he’d tried to have one, but this was still the best in months, if not a year at least - the best since the beginning of his time with Dan. That was the one thing they’d done well together, until the fear had stopped being fun.

 

He looked up sleepily, wondering if the dishes could wait until tomorrow.

 

Pennywise was sitting on Nathan’s desk chair, yellow eyes tracking him in silence.

 

Nathan managed to cover his own mouth and muffle his scream just in time. It came out as more of a squeak anyway.  _ Fucking coward _ .

 

_ Did it - did he already eat Fang, and I didn’t even notice? _ But there was no evidence of an animal death anywhere in the room, so maybe things were okay on that front.

 

Nathan stared at the clown, trying to think what to say. He was feeling cold again, but the adrenaline at waiting for Pennywise to do something was almost thrilling. Almost.

 

“Can - can I help you?” he heard himself say, too softly.

 

There was another long silence, and then Pennywise steepled his long, gloved fingers. “What was that?” he asked almost conversationally.

 

“What was what?”

 

“That thing you were doing with your hand. What was that?”

 

Nathan could feel his face burning again. “Uh...it’s...it feels good. To humans. It’s private, you’re not supposed to do it in front of people, but people do it to feel good.” He swallowed, racking his brain for a way to explain it better. “It’s like...you do it when you’re horny. It’s like sex, but with just one person.”

 

“‘Horny.’” A painted eyebrow rose.  _ He’s remembering what I said. Oh, fuck me. _

 

“Yeah.” Nathan bit his lip.  _ Please don’t ask me what I was just thinking about. _

 

Pennywise looked thoughtful, and then he said, “Take off your clothes.”

 

Nathan stared. “I - what?”

 

“Take off your clothes.”

 

“Why?”  _ Does he...not want to eat cloth, or something? _

 

Nathan blinked, and when he opened his eyes, the clown’s painted face was inches from his own. “ _ Now _ .”

 

Nathan looked down, mostly to avoid the hard, fiery gaze. He pulled off his T-shirt, and then his pants, fingers fumbling as he rushed to obey. “Um...sorry, I haven’t washed or anything…”

 

He fell silent as one of the clown’s long fingers reached out and slowly sank into the soft rolls of fat that gathered around his waist as he sat. Nathan gasped as he felt himself starting to get wet again despite his terror. He wanted to ask if Pennywise liked it, but the words caught in his throat.

 

The clown looked back up into his face, and Nathan thought he could see curiosity and mild amusement there again, as he had that night in the alley. “Now do it again.”

 

“‘It’?” Nathan forced himself to focus. “Oh...yeah. The...it’s called masturbation. I’ll try.”  _ Maybe he just wants to see what I’m doing more clearly _ . He shifted on the bed into a more comfortable position, and picked a spot on the opposite wall to fix his eyes on, trying to calm down. He dipped his fingers between his thick thighs again, feeling how wet he still was. He brought his hand back up to his clit, clenching his legs and muscles and bearing down as he rubbed.

 

_ So we’re now masturbating for the demonic clown so he maybe doesn’t kill us _ . Nathan tried not to shake his head in bewilderment.  _ How has my life become this? _

 

He wondered why Pennywise would want to see this. Maybe he was just curious about human anatomy, or maybe he was curious about human sexuality. Did creatures like him have sex?

 

He told himself to think about something hot. Coming twice at a time could be hard anyway, these days, between the antidepressants (what antidepressants he still had, anyway) and the diagnosis.  _ Well, it’s the second time he’s found me, and I’m not dead yet. Maybe I interest him. My body interests him, for sure _ . 

 

That poke to his belly shouldn’t turn him on so much, but…  _ maybe he’ll take you down to his lair to fatten you up himself. Maybe he’ll fuck you a few times while he waits for you to be ready to eat. _

 

Nathan looked over at the creature, and found it watching him with rapt anthropological fascination. A new blush spread over his neck and chest at the attention.

 

He watched as Pennywise moved closer, looking almost cautious, like a scientist trying to approach a new specimen without scaring it off.

 

Again, he felt the clown’s hot breath on his neck, and knew Pennywise was smelling him.  _ Does arousal smell better or worse than fear? Or any different at all? _

 

From beside his ear, he heard the voice. “I want to try it.”

 

Nathan’s brow furrowed. _ So do it yourself _ , he almost said, but then realized what the being meant. “Oh… okay.” He shifted back so that his legs were spread outward toward the clown, offering himself. “Um...not too hard please, at least not at first…”

 

The first stroke between his legs was soft, so much so that Nathan almost told the clown he could press harder - but then he gasped as Pennywise stuck one long finger inside him, reaching farther back than Nathan ever had.  _ “Ah!  _ Oh my God”-

 

The digit withdrew, and again Nathan considered correcting him, telling him it was okay, that it had felt good...but Pennywise lifted the finger to his lips experimentally and tasted it. Nathan gaped and tried not to stare at that.  _ What if he thinks I taste good? _

 

_ What if he  _ _ doesn’t _ _? _

 

The clown grinned at him broadly, showing off long teeth, and then Nathan’s back arched as Pennywise slipped the finger back in. This time, he bent the digit and twisted it. Finally, he hit a spot Nathan had never been able to find before, making the young man’s eyes roll back in his head. _ “Ohhh…” _

 

Pennywise giggled. Maybe he thought Nathan was in pain? That seemed unlikely. Maybe his reactions were just fascinating to the creature.

 

His second orgasm was already approaching, so Nathan leaned back, playing idly with one nipple as Pennywise continued to experiment. There was a second finger, and oh, he had forgotten how good it felt when he was  _ stretched _ ...

 

This orgasm was even stronger, the way penetration always seemed to do for Nathan. Panting, he watched from the bed while the clown withdrew his finger to taste it one more time. He knew he should be more afraid for his life, but it was hard after the utter relaxation of the climax.

 

“Have you seen my cat?” he heard himself ask. “You didn’t hurt him, did you?”

 

Pennywise looked surprised that Nathan was even daring to address him, but he recovered his equilibrium. “No, I haven’t seen any cat.”

 

“He’s probably just hiding, then.” Nathan yawned, crawling under his bedcovers. “That felt really good. Thank you.”

 

The clown didn’t reply, so Nathan murmured the  _ sh’ma _ to himself just in case he did die after all, and closed his eyes.

 

He awoke, alone in his room except for Fang sniffing at the dirty dishes, and groaned.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "'Does he have a dick?' Nathan had a feeling that the being called Pennywise could have any equipment he wanted. He tried not to wonder about it."

_ This is a terrible idea. The most dangerous thing you’ve ever done _ , Nathan told himself.  _ You could get killed. In fact, this is probably how you’re going to die. That clown is going to decide you’re worth more as a meal than as a weird stalking subject, and then you’re going to be dead. _

 

Despite his fear, he shifted on his desk chair, biting his lip. The fact was, as terrifying as the prospect was and as damaged as Nathan apparently was, the thought of seeing the monster again, and feeling that same dangerous rush, was still incredibly arousing to him. It was increasingly hard to focus on work - which was already repetitive and mindless enough for Nathan to get distracted easily - when he kept thinking about a long finger pressed deep inside him, fucking him while he waited to see what was to be done with him, totally at the mercy of Pennywise.

 

_ Does he have a dick? _ Nathan had a feeling that the being called Pennywise could have any equipment he wanted. He tried not to wonder about it. It didn’t matter; it wasn’t like he had high dick standards, anyway. Dan’s was the only actual cock Nathan had ever fucked; his virginity had gone to the strap-on of his first partner - his only girlfriend so far - and after her there were the times when he’d experimented with using his own strap-on as a dildo.

 

_ He doesn’t know anything about sex. Clearly. And he’s not a human. He only touched you because he was curious _ , Nathan told himself.  _ Why would he want any random human, especially someone like you? _

 

_ Also, let’s not forget the whole “child murderer” thing _ . Nathan felt guilty thinking about that now, but that guilt had never stopped any of his perversion before; another wave of heat still went through him.

 

_ You’re a really fucked up person _ , said the voice that had been there since he’d first started feeling attracted to his kinks - in his earliest memory, he’d been about three. Watching  _ Faerie Tale Theatre Presents: Hansel and Gretel _ over and over; tying up his Barbies to the legs of his canopy “princess bed” and stuffing tissues or rolled-up doll clothes under their dresses; even getting his parents to play “witch” with him and pretend they were going to eat him. They’d never had the slightest inkling of what was going on, but in his defense, neither had Nathan until years later. Until he’d started reading “Savage Love” at the back of the alternative newspapers his mother would get. Dan Savage didn’t age well, especially not when you were trans and a feminist ally and socially justice-inclined, but he’d still helped Nathan realize what was going on, and that he wasn’t alone, and that it didn’t mean he was a budding Jeffrey Dahmer.

 

Now, Nathan took a long sip of the beer, a locally-brewed pale ale that he liked better than most beer, but would probably regret buying tomorrow when he looked at his bank account. It should have at least been a diet coke - somewhat cheaper - if not tap water, but he’d needed a drink tonight, and the pizza place didn’t do cocktails.

 

Feeling safe in his corner booth, waiting for a fresh meat lovers’ pizza to get baked so he could buy a slice or three, the young man buried his head in his hands. _ I need a new job. Or SSI, so maybe I can write, or at least stop and get my shit together a little. Or both _ .

 

When you worked at a call center, getting yelled at or cursed out by those on the phone was part of the job, and usually Nathan laughed it off, along with Trish and his other coworkers. Hearing his first “fuck you” over the phone was almost a rite of passage. But sometimes...sometimes even stupid old people could hit a nerve.

 

_ “You’re interrupting me… ‘that wasn’t your intent’? Are you insane?... Why don’t you get a job? … You should be medicated for choosing this job. Why don’t you get a job that does something morally significant?” _

 

Maybe it wasn’t even the words themselves, but the man’s icy-calm, almost coldly amused tone as he dressed Nathan down, unmoved by any of the young man’s explanations and requests to speak to his wife, the name on his computer screen next to the phone number.

 

He hadn’t gotten in trouble, of course. He hadn’t cursed the man out or anything, and his boss liked him; or at least, liked Rachel, which was Nathan in a dress and more demure. People had been sympathetic, even, especially when Trish saw a few tears leak out.

 

But he still felt small, and pathetic, and hollow.

 

_ The truth is, I  _ _ do _ _ want a job where I do something morally significant. Or just...significant, at all. _

 

Nathan took another sip of beer, and considered ordering some garlic knots or another beer while he waited for the pizza to be ready.  _ Why not blow my entire take-home on junk food? My life’s already in the toilet. _

 

He looked up from a reverie of depressive spiraling, and stared.

 

Pennywise was standing in the middle of the pizza parlor.

 

It was surreal, especially because neither the staff nor the few other customers lingering in the restaurant were reacting to the sight of the clown at all. Nathan watched him as the yellow eyes fell on his booth, and he managed an awkward wave as Pennywise approached him slowly across the linoleum floor.

 

“I thought you would be hibernating,” the clown said bluntly, white brow furrowing.

 

Nathan felt his own brow knitting, too. “Why? ...Why would you think that?”

 

“You fell asleep the other night.”

 

“Humans don’t do that,” Nathan said, wiping a spot of wetness off his cheek.

 

_ “I knew that!” _ Pennywise snapped, and Nathan sank further into the booth, burying his head in his arms. He couldn’t take this tonight.

 

For a few beats, he wondered if Pennywise had left, but then the booth creaked, and Nathan peeked out to see the clown sitting down across the table from him.

 

Pennywise leaned over, and again, Nathan felt the monster’s breath on the back of his neck. “You smell different,” said the clown.

 

Nathan shrugged. He didn’t know what his smell would indicate. Did it mean he wasn’t as afraid as he should be?  _ Well, there’s nothing I can do about that tonight. He’ll just have to kill me. _

 

He looked up again and realized the clown appeared to be waiting for an explanation.

 

“Uh...it was a long night,” he said by way of explanation. “Work wasn’t great. Mean phone call.”

 

The clown cocked his head, expression hard to read. “Who called you?”

 

“I called them. It’s my job. Their union hired my polling company.” The expression didn’t change, which gave Nathan the impression that Pennywise didn’t understand most of what he’d just referenced. But he wasn’t great at explaining new concepts simply anyway, at least in speech, and tonight he was way too exhausted. “People don’t always like when someone who’s basically a telemarketer interrupts them.”

 

Pennywise frowned. “Why do you do that?”

 

“It’s my job. They pay me money. So I can buy food and pay for an apartment and stuff.”

 

Pennywise appeared to consider this, and Nathan still wasn’t sure how much he understood. 

 

“I’m going to go check on my pizza,” he said, starting to slide out of the booth. “Uh...excuse me, I’ll be back in a sec.”

 

Pennywise said, “Sit,” and Nathan froze, confused; hindbrain telling him to get scared again.

 

“What?” he asked, watching the clown stand up and walk to the counter, unseen by the staff and customers milling around. Nathan watched, transfixed, as a smiling girl handed him a pizza - it even looked like the kind he’d ordered - and then slid seamlessly back into apparent obliviousness toward the seven-foot-tall-clown in front of her.

 

The clown set the platter down between them on the table, and looked over at Nathan expectantly.

 

“Uh…” Nathan gulped under the yellow gaze. “I can’t afford a whole pizza. I mean, thanks, but...I was just going to have a couple slices. Three, tops,” he added, face burning a little, feeling caught in a fib. Pennywise might not understand the nuances of human constructs like employment and capitalism, but the yellow eyes seemed to see at least the shape of Nathan’s thoughts, and the monster probably knew the boy wanted more than two slices.

 

“That won’t be a problem,” Pennywise said cheerfully. He looked down at the pizza a little dubiously. “So what’s all this?”

 

“It’s a meat lover’s pizza,” Nathan explained. “That means usually there’s, like…” he tried to think. “Pepperoni, sausage - those are two different kinds of sausage, actually - and bacon, and ham...and I think that’s all of it. Oh, and meatballs.” He took a sip of beer for his dry throat. “Uh, that’s meat that comes from pigs and cows. It’s been preserved and seasoned in different ways. There’s, uh, cheese and sauce and dough under it.” He tried to think what else. “And the cheese is made from cow milk, the sauce is from tomatoes, and the dough...well, that’s kind of a lot of stuff, baked together. Plus, garlic.”

 

Pennywise grinned unnervingly over at Nathan. “I prefer fresh meat.”

 

“Well, dead meat is okay too...you can do more things with it,” Nathan heard himself explain while the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. “Spice rubs, and brines, and marinating it...and smoking it...that’s stuff you can’t do with live prey, right?”

 

The red lips showed an impish grin. “I don’t know. I haven’t tried.”

 

Nathan looked down at the pie, and swallowed hard. It was a lot for one person;  _ does he expect me to eat all of it? _ “Want to try some?” he suggested.

 

Pennywise gave the food a slightly suspicious look, but then a gloved hand reached out and took a piece of bacon off the pile of toppings heaped on the pizza, almost thicker than the pie itself. 

 

“That’s bacon. Good choice,” Nathan told him before taking his first slice. Warm, but not hot. Someone like his father or Dan would have complained about it not being fresh and steaming, but in Nathan’s opinion, that made it easier to dig into, without having to slice it into bites to cool it down.

 

“It’s good all together,” he suggested as he watched the clown reach for a single pepperoni slice off the top of the pie. “Are you an obligate carnivore? I mean, can you eat stuff other than meat?”

 

Pennywise looked up from the pizza at him, amused. “I can eat anything I want,” he said with another toothy grin.

 

“Right, of course.” Nathan looked down at his own plate again, the double entendre not lost on him. “I just wanted to make sure you weren’t going to get sick or anything.”

 

Pennywise took a bite of a whole slice, and although the mouth looked normal enough, Nathan couldn’t help but notice that the teeth were pointed, reminding him of the teeth of a shark. “I won’t get sick,” the clown said with his mouth still full, treating Nathan to a tomato-sauce-covered shark grin.

…

 

Three slices in, and Nathan was starting to feel both the pizza and the beer. Besides, it was getting late. His head felt heavier, and it definitely wasn’t the only part of his body. He hadn’t felt his size since his last binge, and again, how comfortably stuffed those binges made him...if this was a binge. He hadn’t actually eaten more than he’d meant to, although he was starting to get tempted, despite his fullness, to pick a piece of bacon off one of the slices that were left.

 

There were less of these than he’d predicted, because apparently Pennywise had decided that meat lover’s pizza was a good thing, or at least a tolerable-enough snack.  He’d eaten about half the pie. Nathan watched him lick tomato sauce off his lips with a long and nimble tongue, somehow not disturbing the white and red makeup, while his yellow eyes gazed at Nathan.

 

_ Am I still sober? _ He barely ever drank, but still, surely after just one beer he was only buzzed, right? It was just that big meals always… did things to him. So did people who watched him like they were still starving for him after everything else they’d already had.

 

“Not too much left,” Nathan observed under the weight of Pennywise’s thoughtful yellow stare.

 

The clown nodded, and Nathan tried not to get paranoid - but in his defense, it looked like Pennywise was thinking of something devious.

 

The clown picked up a slice of pizza from the tray and leaned across the table, holding it level with Nathan’s mouth.

 

Nathan gulped, suddenly feeling about fifty percent more sober, but also quite a bit more aroused. “Um...thanks, but...I’m pretty full.”

 

Another red-painted grin, like he’d just said something funny. “Come on. I know you love to consume, just like I do. Now, eat.”

 

Nathan’s thighs clenched themselves under the table. “I just...you know, I don’t want to get sick, or have my blood sugar shoot up”-

 

An iron grip seized his right wrist under the table, pulling him to the edge of the booth, and Nathan’s mouth dropped open as his body tensed with shock and arousal. It didn’t look like either of the clown’s arms could be holding him, but…  _ he’s not human, who knows what his form is doing under the table? _

 

Pennywise took the opportunity to shove the pizza into the boy’s mouth almost playfully. “This is what you like,” he said gleefully. “So  _ eat!” _

 

Nathan took a moment to decide what to do. He could probably spit the slice out, but…  _ but this is unbelievably hot, and you want it. _

 

He closed his eyes and started chewing, gulping the pizza down and not even resisting when Pennywise lifted another slice to his lips. He wondered if the clown knew how full he was.  _ And how round my stomach is getting. And how much fatter I’m going to get after all this _ . It would also be harder to walk home, or to run away. Nathan squirmed in his seat at that thought, while Pennywise kept his mouth stuffed full until the platter was empty.

 

The pizza was completely gone now, and Nathan lay back in the booth, trying to ease the bloated feeling in his gut, and wishing he wasn’t in public so he could touch himself. The other being was still staring at Nathan like he was dessert, and despite the fear in his lizard brain, it was definitely doing things for him.

 

It was Pennywise who broke the silence first. “You were right. It’d be really hard to do this with fresh meat.” He grinned. “I’ll have to think about it.”

 

Nathan tried not to get distracted by that. He gave the clown a small grin of his own. “Yeah, we humans do know how to live. I think so, at least.” The beer had settled into his tight stomach, and now he could feel its heat flowing down and starting to tingle between his legs.

 

Pennywise - at least, the human/humanoid form Nathan could see - looked contented, like a predator at rest. “You like to eat,” he observed.

 

Nathan felt embarrassed; exposed. There was no better way to ruin a meal than to remember how excessive it had been. “Uh...yeah. It’s...yeah.”  _ It’s a long story. _

 

Pennywise was smiling with his human-looking set of teeth this time. They were slightly bucked, maybe a little bit crooked. Extremely, imperfectly normal. “Big appetites are the best,” he remarked, and Nathan felt himself relax a hair.

 

“Yeah,” he agreed. “I guess they are.”  _ Do you have a penis? _ he did not ask.

 

“I could have one,” said the clown thoughtfully, smile getting wider. “I think I understand the concept. Are they fun to have?”

 

Nathan was going red again, in addition to how flushed - and tingly - his face already felt from the beer. “I...didn’t think I said that out loud. Sorry.”

 

Pennywise gave him a cocky, weirdly youthful look.“You didn’t.”

 

_ So you  _ _ can _ _ read my mind _ . “Other guys seem to like having them,” Nathan said with a grin of his own, feeling horny and a little goofy. Of course he was scared, but…  _ I’m always scared, so this is just baseline fear, nothing special _ . “I don’t know if I want one, but I like ‘em, too.”

 

Pennywise looked thoughtful again as the girl took the empty pizza platter away without a word, or any mention of a check. “If I had one,” he said, looking like he was sizing Nathan up. “What would I do with it?”

 

Nathan’s face flushed. “I can...explain it. Don’t worry.”

…

 

Even if he hadn’t stripped for the clown once before, Nathan still wouldn’t have been able to take his clothes off fast enough. It had been a long time, and even with the effects of SSRIs and MS on his libido, after being so full and buzzed he was definitely in the mood. 

 

And, well, who else was it going to be? Derry was not known for its LGBT scene, and while there had briefly been an IT guy at work, Nathan was pretty sure he was straight; only attracted to Rachel, not to Nathan. That wasn’t going anywhere.

 

He was still afraid of Pennywise, but ultimately, what the being did was out of Nathan’s control, like so much else. In the meantime, why not enjoy the ride? Give in to the aspects of his life that had come to resemble his fantasies? 

 

Nathan slid out of his underwear, feeling a bit like a sacrificial offering to the monstrous being, in the best way. He sat down on the bed, determinedly not looking in the mirror; that would break the spell, because he’d  _ see _ himself. Pennywise’s yellow gaze was sliding over him was its usual mixture of terrifying and arousing, and the adrenaline cut through Nathan’s buzz pleasantly. He leaned back on the bed, reaching down between his legs.

 

Pennywise approached, looking curious as he stood over Nathan -  _ I forgot how tall he is _ \- and reached down to poke and squeeze the boy’s visibly bloated stomach, until Nathan yelped. “Sorry,” he managed. “I’m really full…”

 

Pennywise pressed him onto his back, crawling over him and settling above him on the bed. The movement was not entirely human. It didn’t turn Nathan off at all.

 

Something wet and viscous dripped onto his belly, and Nathan realized…  _ oh my God, he’s...salivating _ . And that was also terrifying, but it still sent a wave of heat through the boy as he squirmed.

 

_ I might actually die. Should I be praying or saying the Sh’ma or anything? _ Nathan wondered. But now felt like an awkward time for prayer, to say the least.

 

“How much bigger does it get?” Pennywise asked, amused, poking Nathan’s gut again. “I want more.” Whether he meant he wanted to see Nathan eat more, or wanted more meat for himself, seemed ambiguous, and also made Nathan even wetter.

 

That was a tempting thought - letting himself get forcibly stuffed until either he exploded, or the clown was satisfied, possibly with teasing or sadism involved. But no, Nathan decided he definitely needed some kind of actual sex tonight. He hadn’t been this turned on in ages; he didn’t want to waste it, especially if he was going to get eaten tonight.

 

“There’s other ways you can fill me up,” he managed, reaching for...well, the groinal area of the clown costume, hoping to find something generally phallic.  _ Oh yeah...he is wearing a clown suit. I almost forgot. Huh, I never thought of myself as attracted to clowns before. _

 

It was a surprisingly normal-looking human dick; on the thick side, and hairless, which made sense if Pennywise was reading his mind and seeing what he tended to like. It was warm and fit naturally in Nathan’s hand, and  _ Oh God, I’ve missed this a lot. I always forget how good it is. _

 

Pennywise had frozen, and now he was watching Nathan’s hand over his cock with intense curiosity. Nathan managed to push himself up into a kneeling position, taking the cock in his mouth automatically. It was probably counterproductive, given what he actually wanted, but he’d always had an oral fixation. His gag reflex was worse than it had used to be, but Nathan still let himself experiment with how far back in his throat he could push it, clutching the base and running his tongue along the length and under its frenulum. Briefly, Nathan remembered that Dan was circumcised; foreskin was a new experience. He didn’t mind it, though.

 

He could feel little movements in the clown’s body as he sucked, but Nathan only came out of his cock-sucking trance when he felt Pennywise sway and actually stumble for a moment, pitching the boy forward on the bed. There was a close call with his teeth, so Nathan decided to move things along. Assuming he lived, he could do a full blow job another time. Now, he looked up at the clown with some trepidation, putting a cautious hand on his shoulder to guide him back down on the bed.

 

Nathan caught a glimpse of Pennywise’s expression, and couldn’t look away; even to someone like him, it was fascinating. The yellow eyes showed complete surprise, and the red mouth had opened slightly, but the jaw hung in a loose way that suggested loss of control. 

 

Nathan got an idea. He pulled the clown down next to him on the bed, wrapping his hand around its cock just to keep it hard, and managed to sit up, climbing onto Pennywise’s lap. Dan had pretty much never let this happen because Nathan was too heavy, he said, but Nathan suspected that wouldn’t be a problem for a...well, whatever Pennywise was. Surely with all his powers, he was pretty strong.  _ If he doesn’t like it, I’m sure he’ll let me know _ , the boy decided. He was somewhere on the other side of fear now; living alongside it in the moment to do what he wanted for as long as he could.

 

Nathan lowered himself down onto the cock, a moan escaping his throat as he did. He risked a look down at Pennywise’s face, and was rewarded with more of the same shock, and even awe. Nathan shivered happily; it was such a bizarre cocktail of power and submission.  _ Maybe this is what being a power bottom feels like _ , part of his brain thought distantly.

 

The rest of Nathan began to move, steadying himself on the sheets behind Pennywise’s shoulders as he fucked himself on that cock. It started out shy, with Nathan trying to be quiet and courteous to anyone living above him in the building, but that couldn’t last long. Nathan closed his eyes and escaped into his own little world, enjoying the sensation, until -

 

_ “Ahh!” _ he cried out, because suddenly he was getting flipped onto his back. He opened his eyes to see the clown crawling above him and drooling once again, and Nathan couldn’t hold back his disappointed groan. “Please,” he begged. “Just let me come first”-

 

But instead of teeth chomping down, Nathan felt long arms and legs wrap themselves around him tightly, almost too tight, while Pennywise slammed into him in earnest.  _ “Ahhh! Shit” _ -

 

Apparently the clown had some human instincts, which was fine with Nathan, because now he was getting roughly fucked, rutted into in that savage, amazing way that was going to leave him pleasantly sore afterward.

 

Nathan cried out again as he felt claw-like hands bury themselves in the flesh around his waist and thighs, gripping him and digging in and… that might be drawing blood, he thought distantly.  _ Wait...aren’t his arms also wrapped around me? _ Nathan gave a mental shrug; clearly the being could have as many arms as he wanted.  _ After all, we probably established that at dinner. _

 

All his attempts at being quiet officially went out the window when Nathan screamed - an actual scream - because he’d just felt needle-sharp teeth in his shoulder.  _ Oh my God, is this happening now? But...well, what a way to go… _

 

But there were no additional bites, and no tearing away of flesh, sinew, or bone. The teeth stayed in Nathan’s shoulder while he was fucked, another means of holding him right where the other wanted him, as a long tongue darted out to taste what blood had leaked from the bite.

 

Pennywise’s thrusts were already getting sloppier as he started clearly approaching some kind of climax, but with his teeth in Nathan’s shoulder and claws squeezing his belly, the boy easily beat him to it. He came loudly - it felt loud, and he’d probably screamed again - as he felt himself get messily filled to dripping. The orgasm was deeper than he’d had in years - a perfect combination of a kink orgasm and a penetrative sex orgasm, and it crashed down and swept over Nathan like a wave.

 

He relaxed back on the bed, starting to feel chilly, and wondering if to Pennywise, he looked like an appetizing post-coital snack. Arousal ebbing, he couldn’t help but tense as the clown leaned back over him, and he felt a long tongue licking up some extra blood from his bite and claw-marks. 

 

There was hot breath on his neck and ear, and Pennywise’s voice said, “You taste delicious.”

 

Nathan waited. Maybe after an orgasm like that he could fall asleep, and then he wouldn’t actually feel or be aware of anything.

 

He could hear the grin in the clown’s voice as Pennywise added, “I think I’ll save you for later.”


	4. Chapter 4

After the unusual weekend, Nathan was actually happy to get back into Monday’s work routine. It imposed a kind of structure on the day, and pretty much forced him to interact with the generally nice people at his office, instead of being a hermit in his room.

 

He put on his first dress in forever, and considered making a drag look once he got home from work. No one would see it except for himself, Fang, and his few Instagram followers, but he’d been wanting to try out a look for awhile - red lips and exaggerated green eyeshadow, to match the dress’ pattern of red roses and green vines on black. He could wear his rose earrings and pin his red rose flower crown to his wig (it had only cost nine dollars, and since Nathan had worn his hair short since his first year of college, it was imperative). Makeup was about as much trouble as painting, for the same reasons (cleanup, mess), but today he felt...different. _Well, I haven’t had sex in forever_.

 

Puttering through his pre-shift routine - making tea in the breakroom microwave, since he couldn’t stomach coffee, and filling his water bottle - was similarly soothing, and even the start of the calls went well enough. It was looking to be a good night, or at least an okay night, with the time passing quickly.

 

Now, he arched his back to stretch it and leaned back against his office chair. Given how old all their chairs were, it was probably one of the comfiest, with armrests and an ancient but still slightly ergonomic back. Nathan swiveled back and forth on his heels a moment between calls. It was important to remember, in the grand scheme of things, how lucky he was, relatively speaking. Things weren’t always ideal in his life, but they could have gone much worse. He could be institutionalized, or still with Dan, or dead and likely buried under the wrong name and pronouns because Dan lost it one night and got carried away. _Hell, Pennywise could have just decided to bite my head off that first night._

 

He squirmed in his seat a little. The office always got hot and a little stuffy, and sometimes tea wasn’t enough; his brain fell back on its old high school trick of inserting mildly intrusive, arousing thoughts as a means of keeping Nathan awake. Now, he tried to keep his face neutral while his brain presented him with the image of an office chair with a dildo or vibrator affixed to its seat that he could ride, like that perverted old “hobo chair” or whatever it was in the Derry museum. Or maybe just a lap he could sit on while he worked.

 

Nathan closed his eyes a moment and clenched his thighs gently under the desk, imagining clenching them around a hard-on, when he realized dreamily that he was sitting on someone’s lap. Then, his heart skipped a beat as an arm snaked around his waist.

 

Nathan stifled a cry at Pennywise’s voice in his ear. “Break time.”

 

The rough dominance was probably a warning sign, but at the same time...damn, he’d fantasized about things like this. Still… “Um, I’m at work,” Nathan pointed out quietly, as the other people in his row of cubicles completely failed to notice anything happening at his desk.

 

A new, large hand grabbed the back of his neck, while the other squeezed his stomach and then dove greedily between his legs. He tried not to cry out, even though he doubted anyone would hear if he did. “I want it _now,”_ Pennywise growled in his ear.

 

“I’ve got to be on the phone”- Nathan objected, only for the clown to roll his eyes impatiently. Despite his arousal and nervousness, Nathan stifled a snort; the clown’s petulance became momentarily comedic.

 

“No you _don’t_ , no one here can even see or hear you. How _hard_ is that to understand?” For a minute, the clown’s tone turned almost whiny, but then it reverted back to imperiousness. “Now come _on_.”

 

And then a lurch, and they were...somewhere else. Not too far away; it looked like a conference room, maybe in the same building. It had a long, sturdy-looking table; carved wood instead of the usual plastic, metal, or linoleum.

 

Nathan broke out of the clown’s arms, lurching toward a wastebasket while a few seconds of motion sickness ran through him. The clown sat down lazily in the high-backed swivel chair at the head of the table. “That can happen,” he remarked nonchalantly. “For creatures here. With what you people call ‘teleportation.’”

 

Nathan stared up at him, nausea subsiding. “We just _teleported?”_

 

His amazement won him a crooked, even buck-toothed human grin from the red lips. “Of course. How else?”

 

 _You just_ _teleported_ _. And he wanted to fuck you so bad, he couldn’t even wait until you got off work._

 

He couldn’t deny that that was a bit of an ego boost. Even if it was looking like a good night at work, Nathan was starting to warm to this idea. “So...no one will realize I’m offline?” he pressed cautiously.

 

“No, of course not.”

 

“Even if the computer shows it?”

 

“No one will notice.”

 

“So I’ll still get paid for the time?”

 

 _“Yes,_ ” the clown snarled. Nathan shivered involuntarily, which actually seemed to pacify Pennywise a bit.

 

“So…” he watched the other being tense at yet another question, and despite his nerves, he almost grinned shakily in amusement. “Can we do it on the table?”

 

A slow grin spread over the painted face, like an oil slick over asphalt. “Take off your clothes.”

 

Nathan was almost embarrassed at how quickly he found himself undressing. _What if someone finds you here, like this?_ He shivered in the air-conditioning, feeling exposed under the fluorescent lights and the yellow gaze, and he knew he was already getting wet.

 

Pennywise gave his chair an experimental swivel, and the sight made Nathan grin in sympathy until the clown added, “Now, get on the table.”

 

Nathan hesitated this time, lizard brain stepping in. _Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that when a bloodthirsty human-eater tells you to get on the table for them, it’s not a great idea to obey._

 

He stood for another minute, and then found himself climbing very clumsily and inflexibly onto the smooth surface of the table. He drew his knees up to his chest and sat almost frozen, waiting for further instructions.

 

Pennywise’s grin got wider as he leaned in closer to the table’s edge, and Nathan fought the urge to scoot backward. In a low, taunting voice, the clown almost sang, “I can smell you…”

 

Nathan finally got the guts to start inching his hand down between his legs, and managed to get in a few strokes before the clown said, “Give me your hand.”

 

Suspecting he knew what Pennywise meant, Nathan nevertheless started to extend his left hand until the clown crooned, “Other one…”

 

Nathan had barely held out his right hand before one of the gloved claws snatched it in an iron grip. With a cry of surprise, Nathan tried to tug it away, to no avail. To his mingled horror and glee, Pennywise brought the hand to his mouth, and Nathan watched a long, thin tongue snake out from between the crooked teeth and the red lips to twine itself around one finger, and then over another - lapping up the wetness from Nathan’s cunt, he realized.

 

He was unprepared when the tongue wrapped itself around his wrist and tugged his hand into the clown’s widening maw.

 

Nathan barely managed to keep his yelp from turning into a scream. “Oh my God - please don’t” -

 

Pennywise apparently ignored him, sucking obscenely on the hand and arm, and letting Nathan feel the needle-sharp points of the unseen teeth on his skin, though he didn’t bite down. He tugged Nathan farther forward on the table as he practically deep-throated the arm - at least it seemed like that to the boy - obviously enjoying the little gasp he earned when he bit down just a hair and Nathan felt a few of the teeth pierce his skin and draw a few drops of blood. He could feel Pennywise’s tongue lapping at the tiny wound, lips sucking on the arm like a chicken bone, as if determined to get every last drop of Nathan’s juices that he could.

 

But finally he released the now-slightly-bruised arm, and treated Nathan to a hungry, feral, almost manic grin. The boy couldn’t help but notice, with a thrill of fear, that the clown had begun to pant eagerly. His lips and the corners of his mouth had begun to glisten with drops of saliva.

 

Again, there was a moment of tense stillness, like there had been before he’d climbed onto the table, and Nathan had to remind himself to breathe.

 

Then Pennywise declared, “I want _more!_ ” and seized both of Nathan’s ankles, pulling the boy forward and rolling him onto his back, spreading his thighs and hooking one leg over each tall shoulder.

 

Nathan had about a second to wonder whether that meant the clown was about to try to bite off his labia or something even worse, before he felt the long pink tongue sniffing at his thighs and exploring up and down his folds. This time, he wasn’t able to keep the cry quiet. The stimulation only made him wetter, which the other being was probably hoping for anyway.

 

“Ow!” he felt Pennywise’s claws sink into his belly as they grabbed it roughly, pulling him even farther forward while Nathan felt the more human set of lips against his clit. “Oh...fuck…”

 

It was the closest he had ever known “eating out” to get to being literally true. The creature seemed to forget about anything except slurping up Nathan’s juices greedily, pressing his mouth as close as it could get to Nathan’s opening, so that the boy could have sworn he felt a tooth or two against his lips. He grabbed onto Pennywise’s long red hair, while his legs tried to cross over the enormous shoulders, just barely able to hold on, constantly feeling as if they would be shaken off by the clown’s ferocity.

 

Even his orgasm stopped the feeding frenzy only gradually, as finally the clown set Nathan’s legs back down on the table with surprising care. Nathan watched as he sat back, licking his lips and fingers smugly while he watched the boy recover from his orgasm and start to shiver, the sweat that covered his body cooling in the chilly air.

 

“You taste so good,” said Pennywise conversationally. “It’s rare, in grown-ups...most of you are so _boring_ inside. But your fear, and your lust, and your everything else...for your age, it’s something special.” He reached out a clawed hand to pinch Nathan’s round cheek. “Besides, you really are _soft_. Most humans get so gamey at your age, but I have a feeling you’re going to be as tender as a baby.

 

“No, no, no,” he added, pulling Nathan back by his ankle when the boy tried to crawl away from him at last. “No use getting squeamish, now. Besides, you always knew I’d eat you someday. It might be today, or tomorrow...but you knew that day would come. I told you. And you never even ran. Never tried to fight me off...just stayed and waited for me to come back. Such a good boy,” he added. “You even wondered whether I’d like your flavor or not. You tried to make yourself taste _better_ for me!”

 

He climbed onto the table in front of Nathan, who shrank back again, terrified but now just as wet as before, as Pennywise stalked toward the boy on hands and knees. “That’s what you were made for,” he gloated, straddling Nathan and pulling the boy under him while he began to peel off his costume. “Just give in, boy. It’s all right, my soft little human, I’ll make it feel good. All of it. Since you’ve been so good.” He leaned down by Nathan’s neck to whisper in his ear. “When it comes, you’ll want it.”

 

Nathan was looking petrified again, gaze trained on the cock. It was different from last time, one of Pennywise’s own creations, a bit different from the somewhat unimaginative human model. Besides, an opening like Nathan’s was just as ideal as a cock, and slightly less aesthetically dull, so it only made sense to have both. Two mouths (and two tongues) were better than one.

 

That was enough monologuing, the clown apparently decided, because he pulled Nathan up against him and sank that bizarre appendage deep into Nathan, filling him to the hilt. It seemed to do double-service as a cock and a second tongue, moved vaguely like a tentacle, and its precome smelled slightly of spun sugar.

 

Nathan moaned, torn between agonizing over Pennywise’s words and enjoying the stretch, especially with one orgasm already under his belt. He grabbed fistfuls of fabric to try to keep himself upright against the clown, and managed to maneuver the cock into the perfect spot. Pennywise hissed, and Nathan felt momentarily smug himself as he began to fuck himself on the tongue-cock, taking advantage of the clown’s rough, forceful pace.

 

“If you eat me,” he heard his mouth mutter, “Nobody else is ever going to make you feel this good, ever again.”

 

Pennywise growled and rutted him harder, more claws burying themselves in Nathan’s hair, or crushing his ass in a dead-man’s grip, pulling him higher so he could take more of the long tongue. The clown’s thrusts were getting feverish, losing their control, and Nathan finally let himself scream as he felt teeth sinking into his shoulder - not to the bone, he knew, although it felt like it; just enough to draw more blood.

 

On impulse, he bit back - barely a nip at the white throat, teeth scrabbling for purchase, but he knew Pennywise felt it. Another growl, this one into his shoulder, and then the being was coming, deeply and thickly between wild thrusts. It didn’t take many more of those to get Nathan his own second orgasm, even as he dropped back onto the table, barely turning in time to protect his head, feeling himself covered in sweat, saliva, and the come that was now dripping out of him, down his legs or onto the table.

 

Nathan sat up gingerly, feeling sore. _If everyone thinks I’m still working, I think I’ll go home and sleep. And shower._ “You know if there’s a water cooler around here?” he managed. “And a first aid kit? Bites get infected really easily…”

 

Pennywise was staring at him again, but with a bemused-looking scowl. Nathan sighed; maybe the monster’s ego was bruised at his rapid tonal shift, but that was just how he handled mind-bending shit. He did what had to be done in the moment and then fell apart later; always had. “Can you at least tell me where we are?”

 

Pennywise continued to frown, but at last he answered, “Your work. The fourth floor.”

 

Nathan nodded, putting on his clothes and trying not to think about how many different types of fluids would drip onto them now, especially the semen trickling down into one of his shoes. “If you want to find me, I’m going home for a rest. And to wash off.” Again, it was a boldness borne of resignation - either the clown was going to eat him now, or he wasn’t, in which case Nathan wanted to go home.

 

“People will think I finished my shift, right?” he checked one more time. The clown nodded silently, so Nathan limped away to go look for an elevator.


	5. Chapter 5

Nathan awoke slowly in the early chill of autumn; even global warming couldn’t stop Maine and its weather. He stretched and stiffened, realizing someone was curled around him.  _ Is Dan back? Did he find me? _ He was fairly sure Dan would have knocked on his door instead of climbing right into bed with him, but who knew? Neurotypicals just did insane things sometimes, for no apparent reason.

 

He rolled over, and was actually slightly relieved to see the tall, pale, redheaded man with the yellow eyes fixed on him. “Who’s Dan?” Pennywise asked curiously.

 

Now there was a topic that Nathan had no intention of discussing first thing in the morning. “It’s a long story.” He looked back up into the other’s face and decided to just be blunt. “We were fucking, and then he started hitting me, so I ran away. I thought he’d found me. Woke up and thought you were him.” He stretched. “I hope you’re not offended that Dan still scares me more than you. I mean, you scare me a lot, don’t worry. But you can kill me. He can make me...make me go back into doing stuff I really don’t want to do.”

 

“I can do other things besides kill you, too,” Pennywise said, but mildly. “I won’t,” he added with a little nod to Nathan. “I mean...I  _ still _ want to eat you,” he clarified quickly. “But I wouldn’t do anything worse than that.”

 

Nathan snorted, because wow, that really shouldn’t have reassured him, but it still did.

 

Pennywise rolled over, clutching him and pressing kisses and barely-there bites into the crook of Nathan’s neck where it met his shoulder. Nathan could feel the being’s erection digging into his leg as Pennywise rubbed shamelessly against him. “Dan can’t have you,” the clown growled into his ear. “You’re  _ mine _ . And I don’t share.” He looked up to grin ferally at Nathan. “If he comes looking, I’ll bite his arms and legs off one by one, and then I’ll pop his head between my teeth like a grape!”

 

Nathan couldn’t help but laugh; the threat was horrible, but bombastic; ridiculous. “Want to fuck me now?” he offered, legs automatically curling around Pennywise’s body. “I could go brush my teeth first if you want, but you seem eager…”

 

Pennywise didn’t need telling twice, and Nathan was only barely able to strip off his pajamas before they could be ripped off his body. That was good. He wanted nothing more than to get roughly fucked, distracted from thoughts of Dan, marked and pleasantly sore and sure that while he might have to worry about eldritch creatures, he didn’t have to worry about anything real like abuse or poverty or burnout, at least not right now.

 

He wasn’t as aroused as he’d have liked to be, so he reached for the lube, slicking himself and the cock-tongue both liberally with it, although he probably didn’t need to worry. The being’s second tongue could get thick and hard if it needed to, but mostly it curled into Nathan deeper than he’d ever been able to get anything else before; close to his cervix, it felt like, if that was even possible. Then it did stiffen slightly, while something else - a lip, maybe, or hell, maybe a third tongue - rubbed his clit. Nathan gripped the tall man tighter and clenched himself around the tongues, fucking himself on them hard. Between his pace and the lube, he thought he might actually have a chance at orgasm, despite his original slowness. It wasn’t easy for him to make eye contact anytime, especially during moments like this when it was so easy to get distracted and lose the spark, but he glanced up at Pennywise for a moment anyway.  _ Is he actually getting anything out of this - is the tongue-thing actually sensitive like a dick? _

 

“Oh yes,” Pennywise breathed, and used the opportunity to scrape teeth and tongue down Nathan’s shoulder again. “Or I wouldn’t be here. And you’d be in my belly by now,” he added gloatingly. “Since you like that idea so much.”

 

And that idea sent Nathan over the edge, and it felt even better when Pennywise kept fucking as he rode the orgasm out, and afterward, until the being was apparently satisfied He lay down on top of Nathan, a restrictive yet oddly comfortable weight. The boy decided to let himself enjoy it.

 

He’d nearly drifted off to sleep again when Pennywise said, “You’re not going anywhere today.”

 

“Mm,” Nathan agreed drowsily, thinking he meant to work, or anywhere outside Nathan’s apartment.

 

“No,” Pennywise corrected gloatingly, and Nathan felt claws dig into his lower belly and squeeze. “Not leaving the bed.”

 

“I need to use the bathroom, and wash up,” Nathan pointed out, and the clown groaned.

 

“ _ After _ that,” he demanded, and Nathan nodded. It wasn’t like he’d had anything else especially important to do that day.

 

What Nathan hadn’t expected was the web. It didn’t have the stickiness of spiderwebs; felt more like cords or ribbons of silk or some other light, soft fabric. Maybe they had been made nicer than they usually felt for this purpose.

 

They were strong, though. And a little tight.

 

Nathan could thrash around in them as much as he wanted; in fact, he had been. But nothing loosened, or even creaked.

 

A claw lifted Nathan’s chin a little, grazing his throat. “Be  _ good _ ,” Pennywise said gleefully, and opened the first box on top of the small, but intimidating, stack that stood next to the bed. “You’re  _ handsome _ like this,” the being added with a flick that sent Nathan swinging helplessly in the air for a few moments. Pennywise’s grin widened, as he took out a donut and held it up to the other man’s lips. “Now  _ open _ .”

 

Nathan had been afraid this part would be too gentle - even Dan, paradoxically, had had a hard time getting really rough on him in bed - but he shouldn’t have worried. If it hadn’t been for a couple of times when he’d witnessed the clown interacting with Fang, curious but also suspicious and tentative, he wouldn’t have believed Pennywise capable of doing anything gently. As it was, the jury was still out, but Nathan suspected  _ no _ . Forced himself to suspect not, maybe.  _ I’ve got a tendency to assume that deep down, everyone’s good. That gets me into trouble _ .

 

What he wanted wasn’t some sexy, spoiled feeding session, and he didn’t get one. The pastry was shoved into his mouth whole, like an extremely thick and inexplicably sugary cock, and a thumb with a wickedly curved nail - was said nail red, or was he just hallucinating? - pressed his lips closed to keep him chewing and swallowing it down. “ _ Good _ boy,” Pennywise told Nathan, cupping his cheek almost tenderly. Still, Nathan could already see him taking out the next in the dozen.

 

The stroke turned into a pinch. “Isn’t this fun?” the clown asked happily without giving Nathan a chance at responding, filling his mouth with dough and glaze again. “You can have as many treats as you want! I even got you a cake, since it’s a party,” he added, tapping one of the rather large boxes. Nathan tried not to gulp while in the process of swallowing. “You like eating, don’t you? So  _ eat _ .”

 

It was actually slightly worrying to Nathan how easily he could put away a whole box of Krispy Kremes, but he didn’t have time to dwell on that as they started on the box of muffins. They were the big kind - Nathan was sort of wishing he’d asked for the miniatures instead - and after his first muffin down, he was definitely having second thoughts.

 

_ Well, you’ve got a safeword. -Assuming he abides by that and doesn’t just ignore me, _ Nathan reminded himself.

 

He should stop, probably.

 

He really, really didn’t want to.

 

_ “Full _ ,” he moaned instead, wriggling in the web again like he was trying to escape. “Please…”

 

The clown responded by pinching Nathan’s nose shut until he opened his mouth to take a breath, and then stuffing in the next sugar-covered muffin. “Greedy boys who want sweets, get sweets!” he laughed, but Nathan could hear an edge to it. He gave Nathan’s bare belly a sharp poke with one of his bright red nails, and then reached back to squeeze Nathan’s ass. “Now no more talking, or I’ll turn you into a cute, porky little piggy!”

 

“Wait, can you do that?” Nathan asked, curious despite himself.

 

“I can make you  _ think _ I did,” Pennywise giggled. “And I can make everybody else in town think I did, too! Then you’ll get to eat and laze around all day just like you want! I’ll even make sure they serve you up with that sweet mustard sauce stuff you like, just like your mother used to make. I think I’ll even try a piece.” He pulled Nathan close, nails digging into the boy’s side. “That’s what we should do! What do  _ you _ think?”

 

Nathan stared, trying to estimate the actual odds of this happening. “No; red,” he managed levelly, breaking character. Not that the fear of the threat didn’t feel good, on some level, but becoming a literal pig permanently definitely wasn’t in his “kinky scene” repertoire.

 

Pennywise scowled for a moment, but didn’t argue. “Bo-ring,” he remarked, picking up another pastry. And as an afterthought under the clown’s breath, “Kinkshamer.”

 

Nathan stared up at the painted face, completely shocked. His jaw was hanging, but Pennywise seemed too distracted by his reaction to remember to stuff anything into it. “What?” the clown snapped.

 

“I…”  _ Will he get pissed if I laugh? _ “I didn’t know you knew that term,” Nathan managed.

 

“I know everything,” said Pennywise, just a beat too quickly. Nathan watched his adam’s apple bob as he swallowed.

 

“I didn’t know you had a kink for animal transformation. Or pigs.”

 

“I don’t. It was a  _ joke _ ,” the clown snapped. “It was _ funny.” _

 

“Yeah, it was,” Nathan agreed honestly. “People laugh at jokes, you know,” he added purposefully. “It’s not an insult or...like...mockery, or anything.”

 

“I know  _ that _ ,” said Pennywise, tone softening a bit nonetheless.

 

A couple more muffins, and Nathan actually was at capacity. He was wet, too, almost embarrassingly so; it felt messy. It was worth it, though, when he felt one of the tongues - he couldn’t immediately tell which - lapping it up from behind him, under where he hung. Then the second-tongue - for this, Nathan was sure it had to be that one - slid into him from behind, smoothly and deep enough that it made Nathan yelp. He was surprised at the momentary pause in the action behind him that the sound brought.

 

“Don’t stop,” he heard himself moan. Then arms were grabbing him tight from behind and wrapping around him, claws digging into the meat of his body, while Pennywise started up again; the same brutal pace that Nathan definitely couldn’t have handled this deep inside him without morning sex and extensive foreplay. He felt immobilized by the web he was suspended from, and doubly so with the arms around him, and there was nothing for him to do but hang there with his painfully overstuffed gut, getting fucked like a toy; like the weak little mortal he was.  _ That shouldn’t turn me on so much… _

 

_ “Aahhhhh”- _ Nathan had to let it out when he came a few seconds after Pennywise, feeling the other’s come dripping out of him, as if Nathan was even more filthy and used now. 

 

“ _ Good boy, _ ” the clown tried to growl in his ear, but the effect was lessened slightly by his own panting. Nathan didn’t care.

 

…

 

It was later, and a bootleg video of the Cronenberg  _ Fly _ was playing across the laptop screen, while Nathan sat obediently on his bed and waited for lunch to start. In retrospect, maybe the movie pick hadn’t been the best idea for a mealtime. But then, he’d always had a strong stomach, even after the diagnosis.

 

_ Besides, young Jeff Goldblum. With basically the same haircut as Geena Davis, but it works on both of them. Androgyny is just...great. _

 

“I always wanted to be in the middle of them,” he remarked off-handedly. “They were both so hot in this. Well, the first half of it, in Jeff Goldblum’s case.”

 

“Who?” Pennywise looked up from opening up takeout and yet another pastry from the pile; cheese danish, this time. “Wait...I saw him in something once. That one.”

 

“Did it have dinosaurs in it?” asked Nathan helpfully. “Giant lizards? Greenish-brown and scaly?”

 

“I think so.”

 

“Uh-huh.  _ Jurassic Park _ . That’s the first thing I ever saw him in, too. You know, dinosaurs used to really exist - well, of course you know,” Nathan corrected himself mid-thought. “You’ve been here...a long time? Right?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Did you see any dinosaurs?”

 

“Maybe,” said the clown, but he didn’t sound unsure, just smug.

 

“Did they have feathers, or not? Scientists think they had feathers, now.”

 

“Mm,” said Pennywise noncommittally.  _ Trying to seem mysterious again, maybe _ . Nathan reflected briefly on how strange and silly it was that an ancient sewer demon thing seemed like he felt he had to try to seem even more unique and interesting. Or he was just being a dick for the hell of it. Though Nathan did watch the clown over the top of his first slider as Pennywise watched Jeff Goldblum on the screen for a moment, shirtless in bed with Geena Davis. The clown seemed momentarily distracted.

 

Nathan made it through the burger, the hot dogs, and the chicken tenders, and he was just finishing up the fries when he saw Pennywise getting out the carton of noodles. “Actually, I’m thinking maybe my eyes were bigger than my stomach…”

 

Pennywise leaned over him with a feral grin. “Well, mine aren’t.” He shoved a forkful of lo mein into Nathan’s face. “So be a good boy and eat up for me.”

 

Nathan knew he could safeword (actually, his sugar-filled blood was already probably begging him to safeword), but there was a certain point where submission just got too tempting. Submission, and pushing limits, both physical and interpersonal. It felt like playing chicken with trains, or at least how he’d always imagined that probably felt.

 

“Please don’t make me eat any more,” he begged as a wave of arousal hit that actually almost hurt (like a hungry mouth watering extra-hard). “Please, I’m just so full…”

 

Pennywise climbed onto his legs, weighing them down while unseen limbs grabbed Nathan’s ankles, just in case. One long-fingered hand pinched the young man’s nose until he opened his mouth, and then shoved in one insistent bite after another.

 

The pattern of eating continued throughout the day, ebbing whenever Nathan actually did get so full that he’d be sick if he ate more. But a brief nap or a quickie was usually enough to make a little more room, with the only consequence being that Nathan’s belly always felt stuffed, and was starting to look and feel like it even under the rolls that already existed. 

 

“I could make you eat forever,” Pennywise mused, and Nathan moaned through his mouthful while the tongue slid between his legs, and the long-fingered hands slid over his stretch marks. “Make you never want to stop. Just keep eating sweets, begging me to feed you more and more sugar and fat until you’re massive. Or maybe just until your cute little tummy explodes. Then I can lick out all the sweet filling…” His long tongue - well, other tongue - twined loosely around Nathan’s neck to give his throat a lick, before the being continued. “Would you like that? No more worries, no more responsibility...just eating, and eating, and eating. I’ll feed you constantly, but that won’t be enough because no matter how much you’ll stuff yourself, you’ll never be full. Of course...there will need to be a few breaks.” Teeth against his carotid artery, not breaking skin or even biting, but Nathan still froze, empty mouth open, and the clown used the opportunity to stuff another brick-sized brownie into it. “So I can fuck you. Make the most of you before  _ I _ finally get to eat.” Long fingers played with the deep indentation of Nathan’s belly button. “Of course, you wouldn’t necessarily have to stop eating for now. I’ll set you up with a little trough, so you can keep eating while I fuck you on your hands and knees. Since you’re Pennywise’s little piggy.”  A sharp nail poked the roundest swell of Nathan’s belly, and he struggled weakly, moaning around the food, since Pennywise seemed to like that - and if he was honest, Nathan himself was enjoying it, too.

 

He finished his brownie, and began, “Please, Mr. Clown, please don’t eat me”-

 

Giddily, Pennywise shoved another into his mouth. “No more talking! Just eating. That’s all you need to use your mouth for. Besides, you’re so  _ good _ at it.” Nathan was panting, and he heard Pennywise panting, too. “I need to wrap you up in my web again,” the clown continued, voice losing a bit of its control. “I want to watch you squirm and wriggle when I poke you. You’ll never get free.”

 

“You’re getting really good at this ‘dirty talk’ thing,” Nathan managed. Behind him, he could already hear Pennywise struggling free of his suit again.

 

“You have good ideas,” the clown growled in his ear. Then he filled Nathan’s mouth full again and shoved himself inside the young man up to the hilt. Nathan moaned, but in truth he was so wet that the other pushed inside him easily, and Nathan relaxed back into the rhythm of almost feverish fucking.

 

...

 

“Nathan? Come in here a moment, won’t you?” The hairs on the back of the young man’s neck stood up at that tone. It was sweet and soliciting; exactly the kind of voice you would use to lure someone out. 

 

He rolled out of bed, still naked, still full, and followed it.

 

The doorway usually led to the little room that connected Nathan’s apartment to his bathroom, and that doubled as a walk-in closet. But this time, when the young man followed Pennywise’s voice through that door, he stumbled and fell as the floor beneath his feet disappeared in the dark. Nathan couldn’t help but scream until he was caught by what felt like a net; not rough or slimey, but still oddly sticky, as fibers clung to his arms and legs.

 

Then Nathan felt something give his backside a gentle push, enough to set him off-balance again, and then rolling down the sticky net. He was wrapped over and over again, neatly and completely, in layers of silky restraints, hands and arms bound tighter and tighter to his soft sides, bloated middle protruding slightly through the web between them. His legs were wrapped almost to the ankles, unable to move except to bend and squirm weakly together, getting more and more tightly stuck.

 

His mouth was not completely covered by the sticky silk ropes, but Nathan still felt too caught up in arousal and fear to scream or talk, as his eyes struggled to adjust to the darkness. He knew Pennywise was there; at least, Nathan had to hope this was him, and not some completely strange alien monster thing that had no reason whatsoever not to kill him.

 

He froze as a long, giant white thing loomed out of the dark to give his cocoon an experimental tap that had Nathan swaying helplessly, trying in vain to free himself. He studied the white thing as it bent and then stroked down Nathan’s body from groin to jaw, rubbing his cheek and chin almost lovingly.

 

It was a finger.

 

Nathan closed his eyes, suddenly having a vision of a massive clown with glowing eyes standing in the darkness, like an ancient, forgotten statue. He’d never considered himself afraid of giant things or clowns before, but for some reason, that idea got to him. 

 

“You’re so handsome this way,” Pennywise complimented him from the shadows, and Nathan tried not to moan; already, he was wet again. “Sweet boy.” The white finger gave Nathan another tap, presumably to watch the web’s prisoner swing back and forth again while he struggled.

 

Nathan moaned. “Make it smaller,” he begged. “Or all of you. I need it.”

 

“Mm-mm.” And Nathan heard the grin in Pennywise’s voice. “My turn. Close your eyes.”

 

And then the...the space lit up, and turned the insides of Nathan’s eyelids bright red. “What’s going on-?”

 

His words turned into a scream as he fell, and then the dark came back, even when Nathan opened his eyes.

 

The voice rumbled around him now. “You taste so good.” Then Nathan fainted.

 

…

 

Nathan woke up in the bathtub, covered in something slimy. “Ugh…”

 

“Sorry about that.” Nathan turned to see the clown in the doorway, and to his amazement, Pennywise actually looked a bit sheepish. “It should wash off.”

 

“What is it?” As soon as Nathan asked, the horrible truth occurred to him. “Spit, or stomach acids?” he amended.

 

“I’m...not sure.” The clown offered a toothy grin. “I thought you’d like it.” And I wanted to, Nathan heard the unspoken add-on.

 

“Ask next time,” he said, sure he sounded impudent but not really caring. He didn’t have the spoons to watch his mouth right now. “Before you try anything I didn’t specifically ask for.”

 

“I wasn’t going to kill you,” the being pointed out.

 

“I know. But you still need to ask me.” Realizing it might not be obvious, Nathan added, “And if I ever ask you to do something you don’t want to do, you don’t have to do it, either.”

 

“I know that!” Pennywise snapped.

 

Nathan shrugged, feeling strangely mellow and disconnected from the whole scene. He reached up with one sore arm and turned on the shower before reaching for some soap.

 

He looked over to see the clown watching him. And...well, what the hell? “Want to come in?” he offered lazily. The clown pursed his lips and stalked back out into the main room, leaving Nathan vaguely disappointed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to become less smut and more plot at some point, but basically my current goal was just to get out this chapter already. I'll probably proofread it while it's posted a bit.


End file.
